When You Don’t Know How To Express It…Filler Up.

I was fifteen and head-over-heels in love with this handsome eighteen year old I met through church.  Unfortunately, he lived hours away from me and we rarely got to see each other.  One day, he pays me a surprise visit to my house, while my dad was a work.  Of course, having a boy anywhere near the house without supervision, was out of the question.  So we spend the day outside of the house, going to the pool and just hanging out around town, but I had to go back home eventually, and before my dad got home from work.  I risk it and invite him inside.  Next thing ya know we were on the sofa, kissing and then… I hear my dad drive up.  F*ck keyWe both freak out.  My boyfriend runs into the hall and ends up hiding in my bedroom closet.  My dad storms in and yells “Where is he?!”  Of course I try pretending not to know what he was talking about.  That doesn’t work.  My dad finds him and that’s when I hear a cuss word come out of my dad’s mouth for the first time.  He yells at my boyfriend, “GET THE HELL OUT OF MY HOUSE!  WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU ARE?!” as my boyfriend rushes out the front door, head hanging down and repeating “Yes, sir.  Yes, sir.”

We’ve probably all done it.  Swearing, cursing, cussing, yelling obscenities, using profanity or foul language, or whatever you want to call it.  Unless you’re the Pope (and how do we know he hasn’t?), you’ve probably done it too.  Some words are worse than others, I think.  I won’t say the “C” word (won’t even type it out here), but I’d bet you know what word I’m referring to.  And then there are words that I don’t think are really all that bad, like damn (but goddamn is really bad), or hell, or shit, although shit is worse than hell in my book, for some unknown reason.

And then get this…  There are words, not even considered cuss words, no one is allowed to use in my house  like  shut-up and stupid.  I think those words are far worse than say bitch or asshole.  I figure anyone can be a bitch or an asshole at times, but to call someone stupid is demeaning and to tell someone to shut-up is devaluing anything they have to say.

I’ve always heard that cuss words are filler words people say when they can’t express how they really feel.  But I think that’s bullshit.  And speaking of bullshit, what about saying hogwash?  Aren’t bullshit and hogwash just about the same thing in meaning?  Instead of saying goddamn, I’ll say “god…bless America”.  Some people would rather say the word fudge instead of fuck or h-e-double-hockey-sticks instead of using hell (that’s just too long for me).  What about crap versus shit?  Is there really a difference?  Don’t we all think the same thing when we hear someone say either word?

I think this is funny.

However, this is somewhat disturbing to me.  For no particular reason really.  It just makes me a little uncomfortable.

Anyway, I want to know what you think.  Do you cuss or use other filler words?  Yeah, you do.  Just admit it.  Are there some words you consider to be worse than others?  How is saying crap less offensive than saying shit, or is it?  What filler words do you find yourself using?  Cussing can certainly have more of an impact on whatever is being said.  For example:  “I will fuck you up, bitch!” has a lot more feeling and meaning behind it than “I will hurt you really bad, lady”, don’t you think?


8 thoughts on “When You Don’t Know How To Express It…Filler Up.

    • And this is what happens when I just approve comments from my husband without reading them first. By the way, I think ‘shit head’ should be spelled ‘shithead’.

  1. I am impressed with your post. I am proud of you for your stance on cursing. I love your story about your dad. I can see that happening. We don’t use curse words in our house either, even though we are both adults. We DO use “crap”, but mostly use “darn” or “garbage”. I never liked using foul language. It always diminishes the user and the hearer. I’m glad to see you don’t like “shut-up”. I feel the same about that one. I hope you don’t mind me “critiquing” your post. I just really AM proud of you.

  2. Well, I think that cussing is an expression of anger or pain in some form or another. I do try not to cuss in front of my children, but sometimes the words fly out of my mouth before I can stop them. I have notice that I cuss A LOT more then I did when I was younger, and I don’t like it very much either. I try to use filler words, since “fuck” is one of my favorite cuss words “freaking” is what I say the most. My husband says “Cheese and Crackers, Got all Muddy” in place of ” Jesus Christ or Goddammit” and that one cracks us up all the time. As for “shit” and “crap” I consider them to be the same, but “shit” just sounds uglier, so I try to use crap. And I let my 11 yr. old use “crap” but only at home and not with company over. I think that we need to teach our children how to adjust to situations. I mean, I would be livid if he (my son) piped off with “Oh, crap” at church!! So, I’ve taught my children that there are “bad” words and there are “ugly” words. The “bad” words being the traditional cuss words, the “ugly” being words like crap, stupid, shut-up, not considered cuss words, but still just mean to say.

    • “Got all muddy” LOL! I forgot about that one. I say “Chees-n-crackers” too.

      We do expect our kids to act differently outside the comforts of home and I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that. Jacob’s teacher tells us that he is respectful and one of the most well-mannered kids around. He was even chosen to sit with the principal of the school (a special privilege, from what I understand). I guess we’re doing something right.

  3. I have found myself swearing more then I used to and I dont like it. I prefer to say no more then dam or crap. Funny one I got from my mother years ago is “AHHT” which i was informed by my uncle wwhen i was young is short for AH SHIT.

    As for the video’s I dont like the second one. I dont like the idea of teaching little kids to swear even if it is for that sake of making a funny video.

    • “AHHT” – that’s funny. I’d never heard that before.

      Cussing used to really bother me, but I had to get over that once I married. I don’t like the thought of teaching our kids to swear either. With the exception of our 10yr. old, all of our kids are all adults now. We do allow our youngest to say ‘crap’ so long as he says it in the house.

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